Is fear holding you back?
“Should I do it?” Yes. “Could I do it?” Yes. So what’s stopping me? I’ve known I need to start doing some form of exercise for – well – my whole life, to be honest. For all 59 years of my life I’ve avoided any form of physical jerks. I used to hide in the loos when it was sports or PE at school, and the mere thought of joining a gym brings me out in hives. Physical stuff and me are definitely not compatible.
I’d rather breath bus fumes all day than try to ‘get fit’. But – as time has taken it’s toll, and led all my body parts south, I’m finding it harder to walk more than 3 miles at a stretch, and my arthritis is taking hold of my neck and back so effectively now, that if I don’t start doing ‘something’ soon, I think I’ll finally seize up altogether.
But what to do? I’ve reached the inevitable conclusion that I not only ‘should’ and ‘could’ do something about it, but I want to. The fear of reaching out to someone has now been overcome by the fear of ending up a crooked wreck, rocking back and forth in a rocking chair, dribbling into my beige cardigan. (Makes mental note: this is how my clients must feel when they finally pluck up courage to pick up the phone and contact me – they know they ‘could’ or ‘should’ make the first move, but they need to be in the right mindset to get the ball rolling…)
Like me, they have to feel ready to actively engage in a new process that will help them, and have the curiosity and imagination to believe it will work, and it’s worth giving it a go. And sadly, like me, they often come to this conclusion as a last resort – pretending that if they stick their heads in the sand for long enough, it might all go away. As Einstein said: ‘Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.’ But I digress…
I finally plucked up the courage and enthusiasm to contact a local lady who offers individual yoga lessons. I’d visited her website, and read her testimonials, and thought we’d be able to work together, so I phoned her and made an appointment.
As the allotted day drew nearer, I was mentally rehearsing all the negative reasons why I wouldn’t be able to attend. Too busy; bit of a head cold starting; Harry (the dog) freaks out when I leave him… You name it, I considered it as an excuse to evade my first step on the road to a fitter me. After all, I’ve been like this for so many years now, a few more wouldn’t make much difference…
But putting my NLP hat on, I gave myself a good talking to, finalising it with an instruction to man up – be more ‘Big Brave Soldier’ than ‘Big Girls Blouse’. So after putting the dogs in the kitchen with their beds and the TV for company, and grabbing my car keys, I set off – slightly apprehensive but determined to do something for ‘me’.
I’m now fully aware of how clients feel when they come to me for the first time – apprehensive, a little scared, maybe? What’s she going to be like? Where am I going to be? What will we be doing? Is this a form of masochistic torture that I could easily avoid by staying at home?
And just like my first yoga experience, I believe my clients leave feeling safe, assured and happy to finally be in the hands of a professional – someone that can help, guide and encourage them to move in a more positive direction, and even make it fun!
My only question now is ‘Why on earth did I leave it so long before seeking help?’ I wish I’d done it years ago. The fear of the unknown is always so much worse than the reality. So grab that phone, or pen, or keyboard – whatever is your weapon of choice – and go for it – reach out. What have you got to lose? You never know, it might be more fun than you think. Now, where’s that yoga mat gone…….?
Please accept this blog in the spirit in which it is offered. I am intending only to give you some light hearted food for thought here – not reams of indigestible facts that you can find elsewhere all over the internet. If any of the suggestions ring a bell for you – great. This is a simplified version to give you a taster, so if your problem is more serious, and you feel you need more in-depth professional help, please contact me. I can help you identify any underlying issues that may be holding you back, and allow you to kick-start the process of moving you forward again. And of course, if you feel the need to visit your GP please go straight away. NLP, hypnotherapy and counselling are not a substitute for professional medical advice, but a complementary therapy. Thank you for reading this, and I hope to meet you soon.